I must’ve missed this whole story, but an article on Yahoo sent shivers down my spine. I mean, come on, shoving a cellphone down someone’s throat is just sick, sick, sick. I want to think this is an April Fool’s joke, but it’s July (right?). It appears a certain Marlon Brando (see why I think it’s a joke) Gill was charged with first-degree assult back in December because he is suspected of shoving a cellphone down his girl’s throat. The girlfriend Abell was too drunk to remember how a phone became lodged in her throat, and has been giving inconsistent accounts to the jury of what happened before she was taken to the emergency room that night. Whether the boyfriend did it or she did it so he wouldn’t find out about her infidelity, remains to be seen. And how can you not remember how a whole phone got in your throat? Wow, I never thought I’d live the day to read this story. This totally tops any story I’ve ever written about cellphone mishaps. Let’s just hope Naomi Campbell doesn’t get any ideas.

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